Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Falling.

Even angels have fallen
So why can't we?
What's so bad about admitting
We are fallible and weak?
Society rewards the winners
But they also fall eventually
Only their landing is softer, less fatal
Falling is something we all do
Whether from horse or bicycle
Apple tree or bar stool
Or sanity's slippery rim
Like leaves in Autumn
Or dying birds over Chernobyl
Gravity has a hand in it
But it's a weak force compare to life
Rolling as it does from birth to death
So that we all fall off that cliff
And into a long goodnight.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Letter to a Local Member.

Blood will not wash
Its stain sullies the alabaster
Of your pretty little hand
A crimson birthmark of death
Your seat in parliament safe
So long as you send boys
To die in foreign wars
Thus satisfying corporate masters

Blood will not wash
Much as you try in the dead of night
Assiduously scrubbing left to right
Yet here's a spot - out! out!
As the death toll mounts
One man's terrorist another's nationalist
Still you hold the party line
Head in the sand - fighting the good fight

Blood will not wash
For you have murdered sleep
The sleeve of care threadbare
Though at least your pension is assured
How much self-loathing can you afford?
May the lamentations of the mothers
Echo in halls of government
May we see our politicians weep -

For blood will not wash
Having memory like sand and paper
It must honour the giver and mark its taker


© shaun patrick green 2011

Friday, May 27, 2011

rental reality

(or how i learned to stop worrying and love living in squalor)

this house is a festering hole
walls racked with creeping gout
floors stained and crusted with soil
varicose veins showing
above skirting boards
carpet dandruff a disgrace
mould festering in corners
water damage every time it rains
real estate agent says call the landlord
landlord says if you complain you pay
so we salvage what we can
wading through the rental debris
with a pervasive sense of ennui
furniture dented and battered
wall hangings stained and matted
ceiling buckled and thin
creatures scuttling within
light bulbs blown
smoke detectors gone
windows smashed
letterbox obliterated
fuse box disintegrated
yet we call this home
its always been this way
unable to afford anything better
in this dissolute den of disease
even rats would feign to stay

© shaun patrick green 2011

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

Your mind buried it
Those things you saw
Corrupted you from the start
No longer part of what you did
But were complicit in
Witness to torture
Murder and worse
It was simply news on TV
But it infected you like a virus
Taught you killing was righteous
Under the right circumstances
'Right' meaning just and true
According to the red white and blue
Questioning neither medium nor message
You signed up for Iraq
Tour of duty spreading democracy
Like it was a roadside bomb
Exploding for the common good
So you hobble home legless
One eye out, balls blown off
Asking who is killing who
And for what? Another Vietnam?
No reply only subterfuge
The discomfort of the soldiers' lot
Years in rehab and no answers
Expected to enter into normal life
After that amplified strife
In your sweating sleepless nights
Reliving bone-chilling fire fights
Until the dim weary dawn
Finds you demanding to know what maimed you
Demanding to know why your death was ordered
Demanding again to know what it was
Your brothers didn’t come home for.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Monday, May 23, 2011

Parenting.

My parents two disparate people
Who would have thought it would work
Almost didn't for as long as I can remember
He much older than her
Picked her up at a dance
Him older with a car must have been an attraction
And that sweaty back seat I'm sure there was action
Me being the result of their distraction
Funny how the chips fall
Fate being a tempestuous mistress
Or perhaps the Catholic Church
Is a more methodical seamstress
So they were married three months
After my conception
Was it guilt held them together?
Or the general lack of anything better to do
After all raising a family fills that hole
Left by the question: what does life mean?
Only it doesn't answer it
And that's the deception.
Once the chicks have flown the nest
What is left for the parents to prove
But grow old, watch movies, catch discount public transport
Fear technology, lose friends, live as two people
Who have nothing in common except having bred
Steeped in the habit of comfort sharing the same bed
As if they were already in a home
Only it's there's and they're set in their ways
So we shall visit them discreetly on given days
Filling in the widening gap by phone.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Love.

If I could choose from a world of words
My choice would be 'love'
Not because it is the most beautiful
I mean, look at it:
Kind of sad, one dimensional
Having only one syllable
You can rhyme it with:
glove, shove, dove,
But it's not use-value that attracts
Just its profound resonance
A sound that clears skies
Smoothes seas
Makes human the lofty gods
Gives us eyes to see
That one chance we have
At some kind of transcendence
Being mired in the mud as we are
We need wings to fly above.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Breakdown.

I knew her before him
She was a head kicker
Hit first ask later kind of girl
Maybe he knew and didn’t care
That was why he loved her
“A mate with flaps” he once said
I begged to differ
She had been part of the gang
I had been on the fringe of
Seeking identity in high school
Tough northern suburbs metal kids
Who’d sooner punch on
And steal cars and club westies
At Paco Station after midnight
With planks pulled from benches
But there was an innocence about him
Maybe from being put up a year
That made me overly protective
He was my little brother
And I didn’t want to see him
Hurt in the ways I had been
So I spoke truly
Perhaps not wisely
Told him not to marry this girl
No matter what his heart said
But he did without dread
White dress on a black soul
Black suit on the purest heart I know
Yet they made it last
Eleven years and a daughter
Before her true colours showed
Then his belief was gone and he cracked
Hearing voices and her egging him on
“Just like your mad cousin!”
Except he was not mad,
Only desperately trying to mend
A broken heart on the run.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Thursday, May 19, 2011

The Idea of Money.

Paper notes and coins still exist
Much to the surprise of futurists
Who predicted a virtual economy
Dominated by online currencies
Where things bought and sold
Exist as hyper-spatial symbols
Of old world realities
Based on solid commodities.

Trade used to mean exactly that:
Something tangible exchanging hands
Horses for silver, goats for wives,
Kingdoms for gold, power for lives,
A physical process forcing us all
To interact, to argue, to forestall,
To find common ground, to compromise
To read other people, tell truth from lies.

Futurists may yet have their wish
As the internet turns from tool to fetish
For ones and zeros will soon exceed
Dollars and cents in the stampede
To digitise our very existence
Even commodify cyber-resistance
Our analogue selves dooming us
Like the beautiful, useless abacus.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

In the Garden of a Dead Poet.

Fern fronds bend in the arbor
Sunbeams filtered green
A misty air beads on your brow

Had the poet known
This quiet delicate peace
He might not have shot himself

Troubled minds seek the dark
If only he had been here with you
He would have seen this light

© shaun patrick green 2011

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Midnight.

Midnight swings by drunk as a skunk
Six pack under her arm and a sultry smile
So I invite her in to stay a while
Curl up in front of the fire and drink
And talk like old friends
Who have never been lovers
Which only makes me think
Of all the good times we had
Her and I dodging sleep like it were a poisoned dart
Wrapped snug in the illusion that we were creating art
All that youthful passion gone
Her looking older and sadder
But still smart and sexy
And why did we never get together
Wrong time/wrong place
A trace of regret lingers
As I touch her cold fingers
Her eyes spent coals as 1am draws near
Until she fades completely
Its like she were never there
Me alone/cold/reaching for air
Losing her again and again is killing me
If only we could run away
I’d take her someplace timeless and hold her
With all my might against the ticking clock
Stop time with the sheer force of my heart
Hold back the rotating globe
The fearsome force of seasons
Sheltering her from nightly death
In the dark apocalypse of my love.

© shaun patrick green 2011 

Monday, May 16, 2011

Passing Grace.

How is it that I missed you
Gone as you were like snow flakes
On a stiff winter breeze
If only I could hold on to you
But you’ve flown like southern geese
Drawn magnetic by winters chill
Your destiny separate and fine
Mine lonely and rugged up
In front of the fire with a glass of wine
And this empty feeling no hearth can warm
While outside snow falls
And the hushed forest whispers your name
Even trees remember you
Touched as they were by your silent
Passing grace.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Saturday, May 14, 2011

The Death of Venus.

Blood has been replaced by sand
It moves through her with a grinding thickness
As though her veins were open to the sea
But she talks as normal except for the tears
And her eyes big as plates in her tiny head
Soon the disease will take her from me
Its bony hands around her neck
That despite my strength I can’t prise free
Remembering the day I first saw her
That raw punch of her beauty in the street
Like an assault on my senses
She sauntered with a briny ease
Like a mermaid trying out her new legs
Making sailors fall like fruit from trees
Yet for some alchemical reason she picked me
Least among men and most certain to fail her
Arguing art against logic as if antithetical
We were always at odds over what was practical
All those tiny disputes now senseless
In the face of this inevitability
She holds my hand without strength
I watch her chest heave as she breathes
Her wasting away so cruel
Compared to the innocence of her coming to be.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Flat Pack Lives.

Like the blank eye of a screwdriver
You twist me to acceptance
And I have no say in my undoing
As I am rotated right to left
I unbuckle from your walls
Disengage your tables
Build bookshelves with Allen Keys
Out of patterns pre-assembled
Your masonry bit bites deep
Toggles and screws pierce through
Yet what hangs from them is questionable
Somewhat bland like all Swedish furniture
And I dwell here as both
Handyman and art critic
Following instructional diagrams
In a space where we shared so much happiness
That its going takes our breath away
Gasping on the shore of change
Wriggling into new IKEA skins
To meet life's demands though still unsure
Passing ourselves off as committed,
Architect designed, family friendly,
Environmentally safe, soulless and secure.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Quiet Times.

Quiet times are when it hits her most
Feeling his ghost stalking about the place
Perusing the pot plants and commenting
On the placement of furniture and ornaments
She liked the way he touched her breasts
Not grabbing and rough but sensual
As if he were handling tropical fruit
She still gets shivers just thinking about it
But where did they think they were going
Two crazy drunken people on the run
From pasts too vast and furious to surmount?
‘A relationship fueled by alcohol can never last’
And with that he was gone like a cyclone
Leaving a spray of debris in its aftermath
So she became practical and cleaned up
Made a cosy home as women do
Waiting tables and singing in pubs
Calling in favours from friends and family
To scrape together a life for her daughter Emily
But still the nights are hardest
When the fatigue hits and she feels life leaking away
Like some precious fluid she can’t contain
The touch of a man seeming like the only thing
That could staunch the flow
If only her heart would start again.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Co-dependence.

His words leapt into your skull
Like a lizard and you were afraid
Of the sticky tongue clinging to your scalp
A residue of hate and leftover breakfast
Used condoms in the bin a reminder
Not to forget the kids lunches
And why hadn't we used rubbers earlier?
Save us all this trouble of lawyers
Courts and restraining orders
But back then it was love... or lust
What is it now?
Some sick dog nobody wants to put down?
He'd talked his way in again
By some magic you couldn't resist
Pity for the boy inside the man
Or was it the feel of his touch you missed?
You lean you forehead against
Cool glass of kitchen window
Watch sparrows with matchstick legs
Peck crumbs from the dog's bowl
Once more hear the slamming door
And remember what he said:
You ever leave me, I'll find you
And I'll fucking kill you, bitch.
I swear I’ll make sure you’re dead.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Writers are Whores.

“Writers are whores,” she said
And as I fucked her I agreed
Took her to breakfast
Smiled, made literary jokes
Walked back through morning streets
The sun blanched by cloud cover
Old industrial facades rising
About us like bookends to history
She held me like a cuckoo
A prize won unfairly
I felt my skin sloughing in her hand
Her small lips seeking mine
Saying: “Fuck me again, baby”
And in the rutting I saw clearly
That she had mistaken wholly
A good time for fate
Fuck buddies for soul mates
And I heard her break as I told her so
She said she would never drink
Or have sex again and I laughed
Underestimating her mendicant resolve
My cynicism was well rewarded
She didn’t stick to either side of the bargain
But went back to writing “bits”
I wonder who will read the wilting words
Tapped out by her harsh fingertips?

© shaun patrick green 2011

Monday, May 9, 2011

The Wagon.

Another jaunty express ride to hell
You're either on it or off it
According to how far and fast you fell
It carries you some distance
Drops you in a dead end district
You see a bar and think: might as well
Wake up with strange pains
That over days turn into bruises
The stories your bones could tell
No more so than stained bed sheets
Torn clothing and that lingering vomit smell
If only you could stay on that wagon
It might be like those shiny advertisements
Except there's nothing left to sell
You arrive in a place of sunlight
Birdsong and immaculately kept gardens
Your future tolling like a bright brass bell.

© shaun patrick green 2011

autumn

all is sunk to the bed of an amber lake
autumnal light casting pillars
between ghostly trees thinning
slanting against slabs of concrete
sliding like honey down walls and glass
let this season of reflection pass
our hands clasped, feet in dead leaves
this end is also a beginning
why let winter's pall still us
when a single word is all it would take?

© shaun patrick green 2011

Friday, May 6, 2011

Pike River Epitaph.

Gone mineral children
I hear your evaporating voice
From stone cold depths
"Had to make a living - no choice..."
You come back to us
As the foul-smelling seed
Of a nation's infinite need
For growth that shrinks our souls
Sending men down black holes
Lying back to back
In the dim doom of death
No light for them
From funnels full of ash
Embracing their tomb of rock
Smothered, crushed
Gasping for air
Some day we will mine
Your bones for chalk
As if you were never there.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Custody Rights.

Get the kids out yes get the kids out
But he can't find them
Water cold around his waist
As he watches the car sink
Dives back under into the gloom
Wrestles with doors and peers
At their dead faces through glass
Surfaces crying help me for God's sake
Knowing all is lost
And that he lost it.

Argued with her on his weekend
Taking the boys on a trip
Water skiing and fishing
Her twisted hateful face in his head
As she called him dip shit and loser
Now their two boys at the bottom of a lake
And he is tearing his soul apart to explain why
Is this his revenge
To rip his sons from being -
Both his and hers?

He wades in the shallows screaming
Parts of his body are dying
Yet they seem so peacefully dreaming
Safe from his malice and her vice
Always in the middle
Of the battle between love and hate
Maybe it is right they should die
After all, they have innocence on their side.

© shaun patrick green 2011 

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Statuesque

Pagan heads looking down at me
Crushed skulls simple and crude
Would stomp on my own head
To obtain the certainty they impart
Looking through rude unpupilled eyes
Bronze chins of assurance
Angled toward certainty
Attraction of ancient symmetry
As if secrets locked in stone
Could make us stronger
Only we project simplicity and life vigour
Onto implacable masonry
Asking: could a garden of statues
Prolong our decrepit insignificance?
Answer: we are but flesh -
These stones will always outlive us

© shaun patrick green 2011

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Taking the Money... or 'B' Grade Celebrities as Weapons of Mass Distraction.

You crack in the waves like gelignite
Hot as a fuse meant to explode
Some device laid in a parked car
Anonymous as plague
Your name wiped from every registry
So the police do not look
How did you do that?
You, as a dancer, a cook
Your face on TV a B grade celebrity
And in the car park deals were made
As to how the earth shook
But you were past caring
Bent lower than a burnt beef steak
You took the money
Padded into the pillows
Of your country life
No point in sharing
Those verdant fields and weeping willows
With the plebs out there
And so the wretched process follows

You fall flatter than an otters arse
Even TV pundits can't work it out
Maybe the preference of celebrities curse
Here one day, gone the next
Depending on what you had to say
Is the belief in your role as nurse
Where are their journalism skills?
Here they are found in this dire trend
In local government toward occult mysticism
Strapped to bombs bigger than Dallas
And they want to talk to you
What do you say?
That the bomb has its own trajectory
Out into the world taking out people
And property equally?
How to talk someone down from this
An extreme existentialism
Man become bomb, defined retrospectively?
How long should one cook a salmon fillet?
There is always the bang to consider.

© shaun patrick green 2011

Russian Defector Protocol.

Sky thrums at your arrival
Breaking letterboxes along the street
With your smile melting snow
Footprints heavy with deceit
And I knew you would come
The good agent am I
Knowing my defector well
Her every mole and birthmark
Her sweet meaty smell
His bed defined the border
Where I fingered you
Exchanging your sweet juices for my own
Later while rain fell and crows cawed
You pledged to swap sides
Now I wrap you in my coat
Usher you inside like a prize
Cold war daughter of my lust
He will soon realize what is lost
And see it as another’s gain
This is beyond politics
He is a rational man
And this is sexual détente

© shaun patrick green

Monday, May 2, 2011

Postcard from a cheap motel at the end of the road of love.

Drove all night to get to a place exactly like the one I left
Gangrenous light leaking through broken blinds
In-house porn and empty bottles
Spreading like a plague across vomit-stained carpet
Cold showers, bad pizza and vodka chasers
Sounds of humping drumming on paper-thin walls
Cries of ecstasy or agony, hard to know which
And me here with a bottle of Scotch
Because hanging myself would seem devoid of art
Though this would be the place to do it
Bile in my throat, shit on TV and a hole in my heart
You took your smell away as if it were a joke I didn’t get
Found it everywhere like a signal I couldn’t decipher
Wedged in creases, toned in foam
Like a ghost who exists not as an aspect of the dead
But a whisper of the distant living
Anonymous furniture begging the question
Why are you here? What are you running from?
Room 32 judges me just as you did
My testimony invalid, falling short, fucked up
My lies to myself being my undoing
Such that my presence here seems just
Sooner or later the road of love ends for all of us.


© shaun patrick green 2011